deeeeear santa,

sorry for posting so late, I have work all weekend, but right now I'm laying in bed tired but still awake.

--Cool cover (not case) for my Nintendo DS (i.e.: Purple, Simple, not gay, not too childish?)
--A gray (preferably dark gray) purse (casual, one you can dress up or down) sorry, i have no idea where.
--A new wallet as always =) gucci pls. Jk, i tend to like billabong/oneill/volcom wallets the most.
--cant go wrong with pajamas! waaaarm ones please!
--warm fuzzy-soft body pillow cover..i saw one at target. either purple/gray/brown
--a cool painting/picture to put at the head of my bed..that goes with the scheme of my room.

to be continued tomorrow..i'm sleepy.

NEW STUFF!!

At the Hurley Outlet in San Ysidro: (ask philbert)
--gray/black hurley scarf
--purple/blue/brown striped beanie
--any thermals there

**no wallet..i think i am going to invest in a coach wallet i fell in love with**

Snowboard shop @ Fashion (Backhouse??):
--Brown Volcom Thermal
--Brown Roxy warm fuzzy hoodie zip-up (covers mouth when zipped up)

Charlotte Russe:
--Hello Kitty towel robe (like a towel, but a robe...its white...dont know how else to explain it i saw it at fashion valley)

--any cute thermals from pacsun...that you could actually picture me wearing
--any cute snowboarding gear/accessories (thermals/gloves/beanies/etc) my snowboard get-up is brown-cream-pink......

** Bold= probably most affordable and easiest to get =)

hello

haven't been on here for a while.

since i dont talk to many people during the week, I think I'll start writing in here again.

does anyone still read this?????????

if so, i'll be back. haha. im breaking out with pimples. hasnt happened in a long time, gross.

time's up.....

I've been dreading the day I would have to say goodbye to her. It always seemed so far away, but now that it's closer than ever...it's so sad! I've never cherished moments more with her. Everytime she talks, I can see the sadness in her eyes that she is leaving...then I stop myself from crying because I know it's probably the best thing for her. Everybody here at home has their own life, sometimes too busy for our own good. I just can't imagine coming home to an empty kitchen...no tfc playing 24/7, no1 to force me to drive them around, no1 to talk to when no1 else is home..and I know she's not dying or anything, but I'm seriously going to misss her sooooo much. I have never seen anybody show as much love and kindness as she has shown to all of us. K, i'm gonna go to sleep now. I'm making myself saaaad:(!!!!!!!

the life of a nurse

Hey everyone, haven't really talked to anyone except for probably Jamie. Haha, but I've jusst been working!! what's new??

WORK: I am now a functioning RN..by myself, making my own clinical decisions! I have to say that everyday I learn more & more, but I definitely see myself in a much "bigger" place I guess. Scripps is great starter I would have to say. Working with the very underprivileged of our community reminds me to be humble everyday. The homeless/aliens/crazy people/spanish speaking only/regular people (haha) makes every case a little different & complicated but I guess I like it. I can almost speak fluent spanish, hah. Anyways, back to my point...I eventually see myself at a bigger hospital, doing something craazy like doing everything i can to save the life of a dying person(of course with experience), and 12 hour shifts! haha. These 8hours are killin me. I practically live at the hospital, I am more alive there than when I get home. When I go out, its mostly with coworkers...The upside is that I get to make wonderfulllllll relationships with my patients cuz I see their asses everyday!! haha. It feels good. After having these 5 particular patients all week, today I discharged 2 of them...& felt sad that they were leaving!!! & then I had another one real close to dying of metastatic cancer-- I sat with her during lunch today and fed her popsicles.......aww..I'm gonna miss her too. She's going to hospice tomorrow. Soo even if I'm there 24/7, I guess I dont mind for now. The weekends dont seem that fun anymore anyways!!! haha. first REAL RN paycheck tomorrow, exciiited!

SOCIAL LIFE: not applicable. haha, jk. I've been going out with my coworkers a lot...having little get togethers, a pool party, and eating out/drinking. Other than that, I chill with my sisters at night. Been going out a lot with Marty & Sandy & that posse...+ random chillin with Philbert..then our random happy hours haha.

SCHOOL: not applicable, though I wish it were! I'm really gonna missss school :( probably the one thing in life I was good at haha.

LOVE: Seems like everyone is in loove or something. As far as my "love" affair with mr.808 goes.... ummmmm....its alive but I guess I dont really believe if that makes any sense. I guess its bad that I still talk to him, yet the whole time doubt in my mind that it will reaally work out. If circumstances were different (ie he lived here!) then I think of course it would be soo different, but just the fact he literally lives an ocean away...that it would very well cost me 1000buckss+ just to see him...that we DONT have the same phone company so I cant mobile2mobile with him, but use my anytime minutes....that i use all my texts on him...that we live in different TiME zones...that I work in the day & he works at night..& i could EASILY get away with cheating on him (haha had to throw that one in lol)............I guess all that makes a difference. a HUUUGE difference actually! He has a verrry charming personality & we had grrrrrrreat chemistry at hawaii...but sometimes I think I should have left it at hawaii. Cuz now I'm getting called 'baby' by someone I cant see but only talk to, getting Looove CDs in the mail, & being asked to falll asleep on the phone (@ these times Im like omg, my minutes!! hahaha) then secretly 'accidently' hanging up on him when he dozes off. but I DOOO LIIKE HIM!! dont get me wrong, but given the situation... the cons>pros. But whatever happens, happens....if anything I got a gooood friend in hawaii to show us around if we ever go! haha...but for now a pretend boyfriend. muahaha.

FITNESS: soooooo NOT APPLICABLE!!!!!!!! changing that NEXT week. i'm getting hideous under those scrubs, hahahaa.

so that's life for me. until neexxxxxt time!!

welcome to the real world

Since I have started work, I find myself asking myself..so this is it huh? This is what I graduated for. Working everyday, wasting my youth being a grown up haha. I guess it wouldnt be such a shock to me if I wasn't just having the freakin time of my life before work. But I guess I wouldnt do it any other way. I went to NY, partied HAAAARD in SD for a month, and topped it off with trip to paradise. Yup, that's why I think work is so miserable right now. I mean, the job is fine..its just the FULLtime that gets to me. But anyways, I know I'll get used to it..or maybe appreciate it more once I get my first paycheck,hehe.

Anyways, do you guys still read the blogs or am I just talking to myself? whatever. Umm, I'm still in love! hahaha. As a matter of fact, he may likely be coming here if I have this certain weekend off! I just think its craazy! Oceaanns apaart, daay after daaay. haha, jk.

Ok time for Sudoku before bed. it's soo addicting!!

<3alooooooooooohaaa.

if NY was awesome, hawaii was just as awesome, if not awesome-errrrrrrr=)

These are some of the things I did:
-drink & swim at the hotel pool the night of arrival/plan our trip
-1.5 mile hike to Manoa waterfall (beautiful 600 ft waterfalll)
-Kailua beach (white sandy beach)
-hanging out at Waikiki
-walmart like everyday
-Aloooha stadium
-party @ dnbs/pipeline/venus/zanzabar
-Hawaiian waters-water park
-Catamaran dinner cruise
-Germaines luau
-Dole plantation
-Dinner at Dukes
-North Shore
-drove around the island

So yeah, pretty much done almoost everything to do on that island. I reallly think we should all go together..maybe when everyone graduates?? it's sooo funn!

Um, the last thing I have to add about the island is that I met my future husband and we fell in love. Hahaha. If you havent seen my impression of us saying goodbye, you must!!! haha. Anyways I probably met him the 2nd night of our trip and he basically became our fourth roommate. He slept over like almost every night and took us out at night. Me likee likeee him..maybe part of it is cuz I know it can't be that serious with a whole ocean literally between us. We still keep in touch. I actually talk to him a looot..and sometimes I think he's seriously falling in love!! haha, I know I throw around the word "LOVE" too lightly, I just think it's funnier like that. But he always talks about how I should travel nurse there and be with him, and have his babies, and be his wife. Then, I laugh and he says in baby voice "why you laughing? i'm serious!" hahaha, yeaah. I fell in love in Hawaii! haha.

Lastly, reality here at home sucks. I start work this saturday. I had a meeting with my manager yesterday and he's starting me on a full patient load (5 patients) on my first day!! Usually, they start with three and add one patient on for every week of orientation until they are good at 5. ANNNND, not only do I start at 5..but I only get 9 days with a preceptor before they let me nurse on my own!! To me, that's scaaary and not enough time. But my manager told me to stop doubting myself and MAN Up!! So, I'm going to do it but if things aren't going smoothly I'm gonna say something.

I dont know why everytime I go to Hawaii, I gain weight. But I have gained a solid 3 lbs..haven't been to the gym in weeks, yet it doesnt sound appealing to me at ALL! I guess once I start getting into the routine of things again...but for now, Im still stuck in hawaii. hahaha. aloha!

--the NCLEX-RN--

It had to be the most nerve-wrecking thing in my life. Not the test itself, just WAITING and PREPARING to take it. The feelings of pressure, anxiety, and...DOOOM! hahaha..

They say don't study the day before you take the test. So I woke up extra early (to make it in bed early) & went to church & PRAYED!!!! Afterwards, I was pretty bored. I sat in my room & realized that I was starting to freeak myself out..I was having resting tachycardia. Haha, a.k.a. very fast heartbeat at rest. So I decided to join my older sister at a pool party. It was actually the perfect thing to do to get my mind off of things. I sat in the pool, closing my eyes, imagining I was at hawaii =) I also had a couple shots and beers (like 2 each) in which I then achieved a state of relaxation. When the sun was setting I headed home to try to make it to Jeremy's grad dinner, but I was too lazy. I was getting sleepy so I popped in "how to lose a guy in 10 days"...movie ended, still wide awake. 1100pm: talked on the phone to marty for 1.5hrs, stillll not sleepy. 1215: go online, stilll not sleepy. I hate that!!! Finally around 215, I dozed off to the sounds of my ipod.

Woke up, drank a red bull & headed there listening to "Cherry Bomb" (my happy song!) on the way up. Went pee, signed in, went pee again in a matter of 10 minutes. HAHA. the other fob nurses taking the test made fun of me. Anyways, I took the test & I remembered to breathe...and it was alll goood. I stopped at the 75 questions, so I'll be checking the website frequently!! Hopefully I hear news before I head to Hawaii!

About Hawaii, I'm freakin excited about that. You have NOOOOO idea!!!!

"Pray not for a lighter load, but for stronger shoulders."

~St. Augustine of Hippo

I liiiiiiiiiiiike that quote!!!!

Anyways. 138am.
WIDE awake. 3 more days.

I AM SO EXCITED TO LAY ON THE SHORES OF HAWAII...drrrrrunk! or just freakin RELAXED!!!
er..if only i lost weight!

some things will never change...that's just the waaaaaaaaaaay it is. Do you guys think change is good or bad????!!!

Oh, I've been listening to Bob Marley jams a lot lately--me likes. & "ay-bay-bay" is a ghetto ass song. Kinda wish I was at Vegas right now. Random ass blog...Oh well, goood night!!

2 a.m.

I told myself I'd sleep earlier.

Summer is passing me by...and me and Ruth are stuck at the library all the time!! It's consuming you know..studying for these damn boards. It's like the day passes and you've done nothing but sit at a computer and do practice questions all day. I know this is all I talk about in my blog (haha)...I guess right now it's just for sanity's sake. It's really all that I think about--er, all that I CAN think about. There is nothing I think about more. I even dream about it for cryin out loud. Haha, and I guess I just reallly want it to be over with..so I can freakin move on. You have nooo idea what is on my TO DO list once I get this out the way.

HAWAII comin!! Didnt reach my goal weight..haha, who was I kidding. DelMarFair didnt help either. I guess its cuz I'd rather be smart and pass...and just suffer being fat at Hawaii. haha.

Anyways...that's my daily dose of complaining right there. Sorry to bore ya with my exciting life!! I promise when I pass, this thing will be POPPPPPIN! (yea right I'll just be working =T)


Until my next moment of insanity =)

tick tock..tick tock.

Time keeeeps ticking!!

So....TWO WEEKS left until I take my boards. I didnt realize until recently..how little time that is! Nerve-wrecking when I think about it, but I'm just gonna take it with confidence & optimism. It's just a test of nerves..pressure...and oh yea, I guesss knowledge too. A couple of our classmates already have their very own license numbers! And while I am oh so jealous of them..I definitely can use these next two weeks to sharpen up!! I'm a little rusty when it comes to certain things--Pharmacology..Endocrine system..Labs/F&E to name a few. Sucks too that the weather has been nothing but lovely & I havent enjoyed it!

Toooooooo many distractions. Myspace. Gym. Planning hawaii trip. PUPPY!. Internet. Text messages. DelMarFair! marty. hunger. weekends! ...Jack. JK. hahaha.

Can't wait til this over...then I'm done with studying for a whiiile. Oh yea, except after this I would like to know a little less about nursing and soo much more about LIFE!! ...I'm clueless.

SUMMERTIME=)

Welcome!

It's been awhile. The highlights of the past weeks are:

*Nursing class party @ Mission Beach
*GRADUATION DAY!!
*celebrations
*NY!!!
*Baby Ethan!!

Seriously, life has been soo good. I wake up every morning with no responsibility. Starting tomorrow, I will attempt to study at least a body system a day in order to prep for the boards which I plan on taking early July. Ahhh.....!

NYC was theeee BESSSSSSSST! I didn't wanna go home and I have to say that now I know what it means when they say I<3NY. cuz I do! No drama, just good times. I had soo much fun. I cant wait to go to more places!

My sisters and I are starting to book things for a 10-day trip to Hawaii! We're trying to do an Island hopping thing but I think it will be too expensive. I'm not working till July so I'm relying on Bank of Mom (for the first time in 6 years!) for the next couple of weeks. I'll also borrow money from her for the trip. But, it's okay, the $$ will come rollin in soon enough...if i pass the boards!! :X

Baby Ethan is soo cuuute...sooo tiiny..and soo cuute! I'll be visiting often Grace =)

And lastly, I have gained 5 pounds since graduation season. Can you say EWWWWW!!!!!!!! I haven't been to the gym since before finals. So....yeah. gross. I'm going to the gym now. bye.

COMING CLOSE!!

HI!! Long time, nothing. I guess that goes for everyone. We can't abandon these blogs cuz sometimes that's the only way I know what's up. Soo, Jamie..what happened to your blog???

Anyways, I guess for me..you can say life has been somewhat busy? I've been tying up the ends of this semesters work, and now I just have one more final left!! It sucks that now has to be the time for lovely weather cuz I'm stuck indoors studying!! ;( I'm pretty much over having to get A's on my exam, cuz 1) I don't think it even matters anymore 2) I'm graduating!!!!!! But there's still a little left in me that will try to put in the effort. GRADUATION IS COMING SOO CLOSE!! yay! Stock up on your red bulls..MAY18 will be a loooong day!

So in preparation for the big day, I need to: (Call me if you'd like to join)
-go shopping and find a dress!
-get my nails done
-dye my roots out
-Decorate my cap
-MORE cap&gown pics
-Make lunch reservations
-get a table @ Visions?? (yes/no/maybeso?)
-buy luggage??

Yeah, I forget sometimes that I'm going to NY shortly after. I don't know if that's a good thing. Usually, I am soo hyped before trips! I guess its cuz I don't know whats going on!! (&&icantgotoNiagaraFalls, haha) I may tentatively be having a grad party June2, but it's still a maybe so I'll let you guys know.

Soo, Grace---we're all patiently waiting. You probably will make it to may15 after all???! You know, until the baby shower, I didn't realize how big of a deal it really was. Sounds weird..but before it was more like "oh my friend is Pregnant"..but now that it's closer..it's more like "oh, my friend is going to have her baby anytime now" A BABY?? A REEEEEEEAL BABY!!?!!? Wow. Bringing life to the world, how exciiiiiiiting!!!!!!!! OUR FRIEND IS HAVING A BABY!!! hahaaa.

Other than that. BobbyV's new CD is pretty HOT! HAHA, RANDOM!! Neyo's is okay..I liked his first one better. Yea, been wasting my money as you can seeee...I guess I'll go to work tomorrow then. Tomorrow, I shall rest my legacy as a super Student Nurse Extern hahaa....after tomorrow, I won't be back at work until......mid-July as an RN!! (I better find me a sugar daddy until then! haha)

Lastly, I must say: Thank you God for all your wonderful blessings in our lives. AMEN! =)

EVERY WOMAN

i liked this (myspace action), thought I'd share...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
One old love she can imagine going back to
And one who reminds her how far she has come.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
Enough money within her control to move out,
And rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
Something perfect to wear if the employer
Or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
A youth she's content to leave behind.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
One friend who always makes her laugh,
And one who lets her cry.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems,
And a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE:
A feeling of control over her destiny.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
How to fall in love without losing herself.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
How to quit a job,
Break up with a lover,
And confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
When to try harder
And when to walk away.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
That she can't change the length of her calves,
The width of her hips,
Or the nature of her parents.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
That her childhood may not have been perfect
But its over.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
What she would and wouldn't do for love or more

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
How to live alone
Even if she doesn't like it

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
Whom she can trust,
Whom she can't,
And why she shouldn't take it personally.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
Where to go
Be it to her best friend's kitchen table,
Or a charming inn in the woods
When her soul needs soothing.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW:
What she can and can't accomplish in a day.
A month,
And a year.

--MAYA ANGELOU

BEFORE BED

Thought I'd log in to say hello before I go to sleep, heh.

Um, wow. I have nothing to talk about..lovely! I guess my days have been pretty boring for the most part. So boring that I actually just go workout for hours cuz I have nothing better to do. I actually have a couple of papers this week to work on, but after that..NOTHIN! Just studying for finals.

Time flies. May is next week, and a busy month it will be indeed! A busy, festive month! As much as I'm not ready for it..life is about to change dramatically! Not even just for me...but professions are starting, babies are coming, school is ending, etc. I try to remind myself so that when all this change happens, I'll be ready for it. I suppose it's a good change though..although, I think growing up sucks :( !!

MAY ITINERARY
*5/5 Grace's Baby Shower
*5/14 Last FINAL
*5/15 Baby ETHAN =D
*5/18 GRADUATION DAY =D
*5/19 Camels grad/ Grad parties galore
*5/20 Camels grad party
*5/22-28 NYC!!
*5/31 Kaplan Review/Study for Boards
*take my boards and work!

AH! how craaazy. K i better sleep. Got a suuuper long day tomorrow. I'll probably be back on this sucker soon.

FAMILY<3

So this whole weekend, my family from VA has been in town & it has been suuper fun. I wish I could always have a lot of family around. That is why me and my sisters all promised each other to have lots and lots of babies so we can have big, fun family partieees. Weee!

We took my 18yo cousin to get her belly button pierced. In a matter of 2 days we somehow corrupted her just a little. In PI its ok for girls not to shave their legs, but now she wants to shave, she got a piercing, she loves mexican food and candy, and she thinks its even cooler to drink. HAHA. Outta boredom, got some new ear piercings..kinda regretting the cartilage one because I have to be careful when I brush my hair..but oh wells...

Last night went out spontaneously with Ruth and Dianne. It was random, but I had a good buzz. We went to Yardhouse...Local..Visions--Downtown was kinda dead though! DAPA!, hahaa (sorry ruth) Anyways I missed going out...haha, so cool.

Today went to Carlsbad Flower Field--soo pretty. And Seaport. San Diego is soo beeauutifull!!!

Blah, time for clinical tomorrow. Gonna rent some movies, byebye!

JUST WONDERING...

What do you guys do on the weekdays??

I hope over summer I see you guys more than the weekends. lol. I was just thinking about how everyone is sooo busy. Do you think when we start working it will be even more crazy?

Today I ate at CPK in eastlake. If you're ever there...Carne Asada pizza is the bomb-dot-com!!!!

Ok guess I'm going to work tomorrow! Good night........

FINAL STRETCH

I guess I've noticed about myself that for the past week I haven't really been in the best of moods. Conclusion: SCHOOL and SLEEP, or lack thereof. It has been an overwhelming amount of school work and studying on top of Lynn's debut, but after tomorrow I hope I can finally resume a regular schedule!! I have been on running on coffee every morning, no naps in the day, and waking up early..& I guess it just got me!! So sorry if I've been not so pleasant to talk to, heheeeee. (Imagine what my sisters put up with)

Today had my last midterm everr. Got a 90, surprisingly--so I'm happy about that. Got a couple clinicals left and then it's OVAAA. This is the final stretch. Finally got to go to gradFest too..it was okay. What I didn't get to do was go to the gym. It's been tooooooo long.....

Today when I got home I actually had time to just chill and not feel like I had something to do. Jus hung out all day so that was fun. BUT i havent been able to sleep yet!! So I guess I'm gonna call it an early night for me.

Let's plan Grace's baby shower soon! I finally have some free time in my schedule "weekend friends." (lol, jamie...) bye.

LAME!

Haha about 130am, I can't sleep.

What I can't get over right now is how I ended up staying home on the last friday night of spring break?!! Haha, man it's crazy and I'm feeling muchos lame-os right now. Waaa.

So spring break huh? This might be one of the things I'll regret later in life, lol. Spending my last spring break ever WORKING, going to CLINICAL, and pretty much sleeping early every night to wake up every morning by at least 6am! Yeeeah, woooO! haha. THENNNN on the weekend when I can sleep in, I don't do anything! WOOOOOOO! hahaa. I'm soo doing something tomorrow night btw...even if I'm alone. ha ha haa.

Aside from that dose of humor, dnbs was cool even if that place is boring! (sorry Grace!) But you know what was funner?? PB IN THE DAAAAAAAYTIME!! "It's really fun guys" Haha, me and Ruth yet again drinking/eating/shopping at Pb..it would be soo much funner if you allll went. I had a good amount of alcohol in my system= suuper fun shopping. Then grrreat nap when I came home. Foreals, we are SOO doing that MANY times this summer......

anyways, time to sleep. Are we really going to messsico tomorrow???

SPRRRING BREAK:)

After a lot of boredom, I forgot I had a blog to keep myself entertained!

Anyways, it's a lovely friday afternoon, I just got paid, so I am about to go for a little stroll thru the mall =) I haven't really bought anything for myself these past few weeks because my last paycheck was zero dollars! So today, maybe I'll buy a shirt..or two.

It is officially spring break! But even though it's break and all, I do plan on working at least 40 hours because afterwards I will be too busy the last six weeks of school. SIX??!!! Wow, six. I always thought the time would never come, and now that it is....it's just soo..scary!! I finally have to really be grown up! Grades won't mean anything, which is crazy cuz I feel like I've lived only to get grades! All I want to be is a good nurse though, so I hope I will be.

Other than working, I have a paper, research critique, clinical worksheet, journal and project to work on. FUNNN. I do want to squeeze in time to live a little. How bout going out of town for a little bit (even to just eat and walk around), or John Legend concert ($35)--Let me know if you're interested! Speaking of LIVING, I have realized this last year that I haven't really been living, living. I have been living to make deadlines, studying for tests, sleeping to wake up for work--routine stuff. Not really enjoying the finer things in life. So I am making it a goal to do things I wanna do after I graduate. For example, go on road trips, fly a kite, travel, lay on the beach, etc. Haha, yup the stuff we kinda used to do when we were young and aliiive!

Reflecting a little on this entry, I guess I'm just scared to grow up. (grace, you must have something to say, haha). After school, you're supposed to find your soul mate in life. In my case, where the fck is he?!! Then have babies and just groow old..and older....and olderrrrrrrr. EW! hahahaa. I have problems.

Soo yea call me if you guys wanna chill. I feel like I see/talk/hang out with only that one person during the weekdays. NOT healthy, well at least not for me. I like to be around more than one person sometimes. I'll just be working if not. I'm trying to save moneys because I am most likely going on a trip to NYC the week after I graduate. It's cheap and my dad's paying for it as a grad present =) The plan is to see all the places I'd love to see, so it's random but I'm pretty excited! (Im gonna be aliiive!! hahaa) Then in July will be the much anticipated Hawaii trip with my family. And me & daze were talking about a Huuuge all-girl Vegas trip in August where we would rent a giant suite and fuckin party! Sounds FUNNN huh?!!

Anyways, that's all. and Yes, I realize I am going through some end-of-college-life-crisis. Haha, buut "fuuuuuck it"...we're only young once. See you guys out tonight if you guys go!

WHYYYY!?!!!

WHYY must I be so damn careless? & because of my carelessness...I always spend my money on things I don't really need! I have been noticing that about myself lately and its kinda annoying! haha. Let's seeeeeeeeeee:

-I buy a camera & I dont use it AT ALL..hell, I don't even know where that thing is. (ps. I will be looking for that after I blog)
-I buy purses and dont really go out..so they are lost somewhere in my closet.
-I crash a car and total it...& it's not even mine.
-I buy Gucci sunglasses and sit on them & they cracked :(
-I've been thru three silver watches & millions of earrings...and dont have much to show for.
-I buy a phone and lose it. Then when I get an old phone, I'm not happy and spend more money to get the same phone I used to have (which I'll probably lose again!)

Yeah, it's not much, but it is! Things add up...talk about getting my Dad's spending habits! Thank God I'm graduating..I'm starting not to be able to afford myself!!! I think I need a boyfriend for this problem, hehe jk. I guess it's just time to break the bad habit......

REAL FRIENDS/ FAKE FRIENDS

thought it was funny:

FAKE FRiENDS: Never ask for food.
REAl FRiENDS: are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRiENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
REAl FRiENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM

FAKE FRiENDS: bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAl FRiENDS: Would sit next to you sayin "Damn ... we fucked up ... but that shit was fun!"

FAKE FRiENDS: never seen you cry.
REAl FRiENDS: cry with you

FAKE FRiENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAl FRiENDS: keep your shit so long they forget its yours.

FAKE FRiENDS: know a few things about you.
REAl FRiENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRiENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAl FRiENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRiENDS: Would knock on your front door.
REAl FRiENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

FAKE FRiENDS: Are for awhile.
REAl FRiENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRiENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
REAl FRiENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Bitch drink the rest of that you know we don't waste shit."

THURSDAY

Wow, home and sober on a thursday night AND going to work tomorrow morning! Different!, but a good change. Aside from American Idol, my time at home has been a real bore. Grey's sadly re-ran their show again, what's up with that?? Aside from that, being at home has been stressing me out/making me mad. I know much may be due to the upcoming appearance of my monthly friend, but really....really..I've had so many times where I just felt like screaming in my pillow. With Lynn's car officially totaled, we have five drivers and four cars..so we have been alternating cars and for some reason...MY car is the one always in use and nobody pays for the gas except me! This has been one of the major stressors for me at home. Can you imagine having plans and not carrying through because everyones always driving your car...orrr...just straight up being stuck at home (can't go to the gym, walmart, etc) cuz someone needs your car and they keep telling you "well you have to make sacrifices sometimes."Orr just even planning your next day around whose gonna need your car when. GAaaaahh, it drives me crazy. I mean--I know I totaled one of the cars, but hey--so did my other two sisters..I just topped it off! haha. Errr, aside from that..hopefully my sister will be purchasing her AcuraTL this Sunday to take away this problem...

Anyways, things haven't really been the greatest--well nothing to be all excited to blog about. It's been boring..I lost my phone and phone numbers (my social life)...I hate my old hand-me-down phone. My dogs have been barking out my window nonstop for the past nights interupting my sleep...Uhh, all Ive been doing is school work..had a midterm today which marks my first nursing test i DIDNT study for...& i dont know. haha.

Dang, hopefully next entry will be a little brighter. I need some you know what...you know what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you dont know, ask. hahah.

$$$$$$$$

Ohhh man, yet ANOTHER friday where I have failed to go to work. I have not worked for sooo long...and yet I spend money like i work Full-time. I think that the problem roots from riding to school with marty on Thursdays. After class, we always go somewhere and end up someway, somehow drinking to a point where it is no longer a question if we are going to work or not! Every thursday! and Fridays are the only days I really have time to work.

Anywaays, today is Martys 24th birthday. I got him a pair of Prada sunglasses...........but he WILL pay me back! Do you guys wanna go to altitude with me...please? But anyways, that's mah buddyyyy.

At least Im sticking to one of my new yrs resolutions which was to do well in school. i got a 98 on my test, wooohoooo. As for the rest, I have failed. Soo I'll call ya'll up later. I got a big ass bottle of captain morgan that was on sale at the NEX for 15.99....I might need some help drinking it, har har har.

p.s. Lotto jackpot: 267 million........wow.

OVER IT..

As much as I am scared to graduate and don't want to (yup!), it is times like this when I just wish school was done with!! My brain is fried...after three years of straight nursing..I am tired. I am at the Rbr in desperate need of motivation! I'm tired of waking up in panic because I have to study haha..I'm tired of memorizing..I'm tired of dreaming about nursing concepts....I'm tired of my life revolving around exams & projects..but I love love learning (& i think i love nursing too)!!--just without the added stress of exams/papers/clinicals/busy work. Hmph.

Anyways, I had fun at your party Jamie. Was surprisingly drunk, hah. Great mixture of rum/Vodka/Beer...ehh, yum. good times=)

&I NEEEED TO GO TO THE GYM!! its been 2wks & havent been cuz of no time. I am starting to get way disgusted by the extra jiggle I am now noticing, ew.

Back to studying........school sucks. Senioritis? I think so.

PEOPLE PLEASER

I have learned that you can't always please everybody. & well, to some extent I always knew that but still have always tried to do it. Anyways I come into a recent situation where I didn't please someone, haha, and it bothered me. I didn't do anything wrong really, she just totally misunderstood me. Soo, I tried to call her to clarify things so she knew what was up... but she cancelled my call!! ::insert SHOCKED face here!:: hahaa. Who is she? Ehh, a friend..maybe even an acquaintance. When do I see her? not a lot. Why do I care? I dont know....why do I!?! hahaha.

So advice of the day. You can try your best to make everyone happy, but sometimes you can't do it...and that shouldn't bother you.

Ok, I feel better--I'm over it!! Time to study. See you guys tonight!

ASH WEDNESDAY

After much hesitance and contemplation, I have decided to give up WHISKEY for lent. What female in this world besides me does that??? First, I was only going to give up Crown, but that would be cheating cuz I would drink Jack all the time. Soo, there you go..I have given up the only two drinks that reallyhave the capability of getting me drunk. Aw, how sad...whats harder..this? or myspace like last year, hehehe. I also have another personal one, but I won't say because I am starting to get paranoid that more people read this blog than i think haha. BTW, if any of you guys go to Ash Wednesday mass..can you take me?!! I need a ride!

Today is such a NICE day...and I'm sad because I am stuck at home. I have accomplished two hours of studying and I think I am now an expert on Critical Pulmonary Dysfunction....or am i?! I am starting to feel a little overwhelmed with my school load right now. It's hard for me to get the right balance with a work and social life. Hmm, I am strugggling to work 1 day a week..and I am trying everything I can so I can go out Saturday night without feeling stressed out. Haha, I hope I can handle it.

Since the accident, things have gotten much better. I think I actually talk to my parents more, haha. My sistas have been totally understanding about the car situation because we are now short cars cuz my Dad is back in Lb with the truck. Buut one thing is starting to worry me. Being the person who never really has headaches....I would say I am getting a little concerned that since the accident, I have been getting constant headaches daily that sometimes is not relieved by Tylenol/Aspirin/Ibuprofen. I've tried all three! Soo I'm really hoping it may be due to lack of sleep..not any kind of head trauma! Ohh man.

I can't get over how nice it is outside. Back to studying............................

TEMPLATES

i keep changing them cuz I dont like blogging when its ugly..

anyways I think I like this one...testing testing 123...

yea i like it. more blogging to come! hahahaaa

ohhhh man i should soo be studying or better yet SLEEEEPING!!!!

ps i have nothing to do tomorrow cuz I have no car, boo.

ICEBOX

not to be so coldhearted, but uhhh...CC (you figure) is insanely annoying.

Advice of the day: Never give your phone number out of pity.

Errrrrrrrrrrrrr. haha, School sucks.

YOU LIVE & YOU LEARN

As the whole world apparently seems to know, I put everything I'm worth on the line monday night because of a stupid decision. The whole idea of it still haunts me, although I'd like to think I'm moving forward from it. A certain friend of mine claims to take 60% responsibility from that night, but I can account for my own actions. & definitely, from that night, I will never drive drunk again...& neither will you guys! =P

It's kind of one of those things that you kinda never think will happen to you. You could talk about how bad it would be if it did, but never REAALY think about it until it almost happens to you. When I got in the accident, I swear to you NOTHING else mattered to me. Not the pain, the damage, the other person...just how I was definitely going to get a dui that night. Three cops came and listened to my sob story..and (with God watching me!) they let me go..and I walked away with a life lesson learned.

Afterwards, I was soo depressed...and ashamed to walk into my house. In a mild way, I still am but I'm moving forward (I like to think I have great coping skills, haha). The biggest hurt for me was disappointing my parents. They weren't mad, just disappointed...and you could see it in their face, hear it in their voice--- and to me, that's worse than them yelling in my face! We are talking though, it's put in the past, & it's actually my Dad's 56th birthday today sooo....all he asked for was "peace of mind" in his words exactly...hmmm...i wonder why. heh.

& with all this going on...School has definitely been picking up. It doesn't help that my minds been up in the clouds lately. I only have one day a week to work (which is Fridays), but I couldn't today because last night I got the stomach bug from eating at Seau's (Clam Linguini & Sushi) soo I was throwing up all night. I'm kinda low on funds...so I'm actually thinking about working Saturday. I havent worked for almost 2 wks, kinda stressful that money makes the world go round. I can't wait to make a steady paycheck.

What else. How was Valentines? I really could care less about it that day & it didn't cross my mind until I saw all the nurses wearing red...but mine ended up being reallly fuckin ODD. I would have to fill you guys in on that. All bitterness aside (single or taken), I still hate that holiday. Who made it up?!

And soo here I am at the end of the week. Thinking about how crazy it all has been. Thinking about how I never had a chance to just sit down and think. With the insane number of phonecalls I got after that accident, I guess I realized that a lot of people do care (haha). And the fact that I'm still alive, nobody's dead because of me, and I can still be a nurse when I graduate this May......well, geez...I know now more than ever that God is watching us...& I am fortunate & lucky to be sitting here and blogging on pretty Friday afternoon. Whew.

noo fair...

hey, Tess got a new car! I would have to say now, that my car is the ugliest on the lot by far. Doesn't help that Tess' new car is white too...now mine looks yellow :( haha

btw, Fun weekend guys=)

back to Reality. I am soo behind on readings..assignments..lectures...school in general I think mostly because clinicals havent started, soo it was never official to me. Well, got my first one tomorrow in the SICU & wow, I am exciiited but NOT prepared at all. So today, will be devoted to just that--reading everything I possibly can so I don't look like a total idiot tomorrow. &maybe a trip to Walmart & the gym?! hmmmmmm............

if you're still bored right now...go find something to do for Spring break!! Ensenadaa? hahahaa...


this circular motion is all we do.

surprise...surprise

Inang slipped. Today she told me my dad was coming home..possibly in the next two days. They have been keeping it a secret from us for God knows why...& I have quite mixed emotions.

I was sooo excited. I really honestly, and truly miss my Dad. Then, I realized how different it would be. Me and my sisters have gone crazy without a paternal figure to keep us in check. I'm talkin about belligerent drinkups at the house, boys sleeping over, not sleeping at home, etc. & so in many ways it's a good thing. I have to behave now ;) harhar. but Tell me why am I kind of dreading it?!! Lol, I'm dreading having to be behaved. wtF!?

It's also cuz before he was at home only on weekends, but now since his house is rented out, I'm guessing he's gonna be around the house for a while. Weeird. I haven't realized how much I was used to him not being around. Oh well, I'm glad. My mom's gonna be soooo much happier, our family will be in better shape, and the house and cars won't keep crumbling apart, heh.

If I sounded like I didn't want him here, it's not that at all...it's just weeird! I have no idea why I am so weirded out. Probably because this is all so imminent and unexpected. but yah, I love my dad! its just weird!! hahaha.

k, thought I'd keep you guys updated. Very likely to see ya'll Wednesday =) Time to study for a little quiz that can make me or break me tomorrow morning. Wish me luck.

HOW TIMES HAVE CHANGED

I'm woken up by dehydration, & I'm pretty bored...soo here I am!! Before I begin my story...I would like to say I changed my layout (obviously) & I am absolutely hating it but cant change it back to what it was cuz I forgot how. ok. haha.

Last night I had a verrry good time! I would have to say me & dianne make a FUN duo! Even if it's just us two all time, I think that's when we have the most fun cuz we just go uninhibited and i love itt. Last night would be the perfect example. "Nobody wants to go out again?! Oh well, who cares...let's just go anyways!" Me and Dianne were thinkin we're soo lame we don't have friends..so the plan of action was to get new phone numbers from guys and girls so we have weekend friends hahaa.

So we end up going to downtown to go to Visions, and get parking riiight across the street! When we got in, to our surprise was the "mafia" minus one bf in particular, whew! Funny because on our way to downtown we were discussing how we kinda missed going out with them...and just yesterday I was looking at pictures when we used to go out all time. So anyways, we actually hung out with them thru the night and had a good time & kinda felt like i missed them! hahaha--it was a reciprocal feeling btw!....In a strange and weird way, despite how 'bitchy' they can get, I just wish our friendships didn't have to change so much. I know life has definitely moved on and at times I could really care less if things were fixed or not, but if amends were made..everything would be sooo much more peachy. Haha, for me at least. So i put the 'sexy funeral' vegas pic..because how ironic..little did we know that was PQs funeral!!!!! cuz I cant really remember being 'normal' since then. LOL. jk jk jk.


So I was getting aside from the point. Well we went out with intentions of getting new friends... but I guess the old works out perfectly too. Yup.

BACK TO WORK

After about almost three weeks of completely no work and being a bum...I finalllly went back! I need to get back to my routine of waking up at 6am, if not earlier, so that I could make it to either clinical/work/or class. Looks like once this semester starts rollin, I'm gonna be a busy person if I let myself (that is, if I'm not procrastinating!) I have printed probably 100+ pages from my printer right now for my class tomorrow so I'm thinking is there another alternative?!! Cuz this is a whoole lot of printing!

Been going to the gym, & I've seen this guy in the sauna (@Hst) like twice...and sometimes we talk. Well, I think I'm in <3333! Hahaha, jk. Just a gym crush. As for me and my other buddy (you know who), we're cool & I think I'm finally letting myself not care about it so much cuz I shouldn't care about it so much, ya know? But we're still close peoples (& I have been chillin with his friends more than mine, ahem! haha jk) because he's part of my whole social/work/school life..how did that happen?!!! Haha, jk it's cool..sometimes not. & that's that! ...story of my life...hahaha.

In other news, Grace's baby is a healthy baby! yayy, I'm excited for her and obbybob! I won bridal bazaar tickets on the radio the other day (Yah, weird huh?) & there are soo many people getting married this year!...maybe even one of the PQers, har har har. crrazy. We're old. Ok I am done. I have yet to begin studying EKGs and drug calculations, bye bye!

theeee END

So it's the end of Winter break. One more semester, and we're DONE! Everytime I think about it I get nervous, sad, excited, anxious, happy, etc. I feel like I won't know what to do with myself. I do, however, have a pretty lengthy list of things I want to buy once I start working..but we shall not get into that.

The last few days of break have been RELAXING. I am going on more than a week of no work..WOW. It's nice but I couldn't do it forever. School's starting tomorrow, then I'll probably work once a week if I can.

Anywaaays. Yeah. I have nothing to talk about. haha. Laame. bye...this is boring!

LOL!

Ohhh my gosh!

I was looking at my resolution list and let's just say I already broke more than half of them, 5 out of 7 to be exact! I would rather not discuss it though, it makes me sad. Hahaha.

Anyways, since we haven't been out..I have managed to finish a whole entire season of Nip Tuck which is (738 mins!) in less than two days!!! I have already began season II..Yes, it is so disturbingly good I'm addicted!! I have also worked 56 hours for my next paycheck (cha-ching!) and have gotten really close to my coworkers since I'm around them so much! haha. We have also put down our Christmas Village :( How SAAD. The holidays are over.......*tear, tear.

Soo tomorrow is CARLAS birthday!! Yayyy, for the old lady! hahah, jk. See you guys then? or maybe sooner!