YOU LIVE & YOU LEARN

As the whole world apparently seems to know, I put everything I'm worth on the line monday night because of a stupid decision. The whole idea of it still haunts me, although I'd like to think I'm moving forward from it. A certain friend of mine claims to take 60% responsibility from that night, but I can account for my own actions. & definitely, from that night, I will never drive drunk again...& neither will you guys! =P

It's kind of one of those things that you kinda never think will happen to you. You could talk about how bad it would be if it did, but never REAALY think about it until it almost happens to you. When I got in the accident, I swear to you NOTHING else mattered to me. Not the pain, the damage, the other person...just how I was definitely going to get a dui that night. Three cops came and listened to my sob story..and (with God watching me!) they let me go..and I walked away with a life lesson learned.

Afterwards, I was soo depressed...and ashamed to walk into my house. In a mild way, I still am but I'm moving forward (I like to think I have great coping skills, haha). The biggest hurt for me was disappointing my parents. They weren't mad, just disappointed...and you could see it in their face, hear it in their voice--- and to me, that's worse than them yelling in my face! We are talking though, it's put in the past, & it's actually my Dad's 56th birthday today sooo....all he asked for was "peace of mind" in his words exactly...hmmm...i wonder why. heh.

& with all this going on...School has definitely been picking up. It doesn't help that my minds been up in the clouds lately. I only have one day a week to work (which is Fridays), but I couldn't today because last night I got the stomach bug from eating at Seau's (Clam Linguini & Sushi) soo I was throwing up all night. I'm kinda low on funds...so I'm actually thinking about working Saturday. I havent worked for almost 2 wks, kinda stressful that money makes the world go round. I can't wait to make a steady paycheck.

What else. How was Valentines? I really could care less about it that day & it didn't cross my mind until I saw all the nurses wearing red...but mine ended up being reallly fuckin ODD. I would have to fill you guys in on that. All bitterness aside (single or taken), I still hate that holiday. Who made it up?!

And soo here I am at the end of the week. Thinking about how crazy it all has been. Thinking about how I never had a chance to just sit down and think. With the insane number of phonecalls I got after that accident, I guess I realized that a lot of people do care (haha). And the fact that I'm still alive, nobody's dead because of me, and I can still be a nurse when I graduate this May......well, geez...I know now more than ever that God is watching us...& I am fortunate & lucky to be sitting here and blogging on pretty Friday afternoon. Whew.