OVER IT..

As much as I am scared to graduate and don't want to (yup!), it is times like this when I just wish school was done with!! My brain is fried...after three years of straight nursing..I am tired. I am at the Rbr in desperate need of motivation! I'm tired of waking up in panic because I have to study haha..I'm tired of memorizing..I'm tired of dreaming about nursing concepts....I'm tired of my life revolving around exams & projects..but I love love learning (& i think i love nursing too)!!--just without the added stress of exams/papers/clinicals/busy work. Hmph.

Anyways, I had fun at your party Jamie. Was surprisingly drunk, hah. Great mixture of rum/Vodka/Beer...ehh, yum. good times=)

&I NEEEED TO GO TO THE GYM!! its been 2wks & havent been cuz of no time. I am starting to get way disgusted by the extra jiggle I am now noticing, ew.

Back to studying........school sucks. Senioritis? I think so.

PEOPLE PLEASER

I have learned that you can't always please everybody. & well, to some extent I always knew that but still have always tried to do it. Anyways I come into a recent situation where I didn't please someone, haha, and it bothered me. I didn't do anything wrong really, she just totally misunderstood me. Soo, I tried to call her to clarify things so she knew what was up... but she cancelled my call!! ::insert SHOCKED face here!:: hahaa. Who is she? Ehh, a friend..maybe even an acquaintance. When do I see her? not a lot. Why do I care? I dont know....why do I!?! hahaha.

So advice of the day. You can try your best to make everyone happy, but sometimes you can't do it...and that shouldn't bother you.

Ok, I feel better--I'm over it!! Time to study. See you guys tonight!

ASH WEDNESDAY

After much hesitance and contemplation, I have decided to give up WHISKEY for lent. What female in this world besides me does that??? First, I was only going to give up Crown, but that would be cheating cuz I would drink Jack all the time. Soo, there you go..I have given up the only two drinks that reallyhave the capability of getting me drunk. Aw, how sad...whats harder..this? or myspace like last year, hehehe. I also have another personal one, but I won't say because I am starting to get paranoid that more people read this blog than i think haha. BTW, if any of you guys go to Ash Wednesday mass..can you take me?!! I need a ride!

Today is such a NICE day...and I'm sad because I am stuck at home. I have accomplished two hours of studying and I think I am now an expert on Critical Pulmonary Dysfunction....or am i?! I am starting to feel a little overwhelmed with my school load right now. It's hard for me to get the right balance with a work and social life. Hmm, I am strugggling to work 1 day a week..and I am trying everything I can so I can go out Saturday night without feeling stressed out. Haha, I hope I can handle it.

Since the accident, things have gotten much better. I think I actually talk to my parents more, haha. My sistas have been totally understanding about the car situation because we are now short cars cuz my Dad is back in Lb with the truck. Buut one thing is starting to worry me. Being the person who never really has headaches....I would say I am getting a little concerned that since the accident, I have been getting constant headaches daily that sometimes is not relieved by Tylenol/Aspirin/Ibuprofen. I've tried all three! Soo I'm really hoping it may be due to lack of sleep..not any kind of head trauma! Ohh man.

I can't get over how nice it is outside. Back to studying............................

TEMPLATES

i keep changing them cuz I dont like blogging when its ugly..

anyways I think I like this one...testing testing 123...

yea i like it. more blogging to come! hahahaaa

ohhhh man i should soo be studying or better yet SLEEEEPING!!!!

ps i have nothing to do tomorrow cuz I have no car, boo.

ICEBOX

not to be so coldhearted, but uhhh...CC (you figure) is insanely annoying.

Advice of the day: Never give your phone number out of pity.

Errrrrrrrrrrrrr. haha, School sucks.

YOU LIVE & YOU LEARN

As the whole world apparently seems to know, I put everything I'm worth on the line monday night because of a stupid decision. The whole idea of it still haunts me, although I'd like to think I'm moving forward from it. A certain friend of mine claims to take 60% responsibility from that night, but I can account for my own actions. & definitely, from that night, I will never drive drunk again...& neither will you guys! =P

It's kind of one of those things that you kinda never think will happen to you. You could talk about how bad it would be if it did, but never REAALY think about it until it almost happens to you. When I got in the accident, I swear to you NOTHING else mattered to me. Not the pain, the damage, the other person...just how I was definitely going to get a dui that night. Three cops came and listened to my sob story..and (with God watching me!) they let me go..and I walked away with a life lesson learned.

Afterwards, I was soo depressed...and ashamed to walk into my house. In a mild way, I still am but I'm moving forward (I like to think I have great coping skills, haha). The biggest hurt for me was disappointing my parents. They weren't mad, just disappointed...and you could see it in their face, hear it in their voice--- and to me, that's worse than them yelling in my face! We are talking though, it's put in the past, & it's actually my Dad's 56th birthday today sooo....all he asked for was "peace of mind" in his words exactly...hmmm...i wonder why. heh.

& with all this going on...School has definitely been picking up. It doesn't help that my minds been up in the clouds lately. I only have one day a week to work (which is Fridays), but I couldn't today because last night I got the stomach bug from eating at Seau's (Clam Linguini & Sushi) soo I was throwing up all night. I'm kinda low on funds...so I'm actually thinking about working Saturday. I havent worked for almost 2 wks, kinda stressful that money makes the world go round. I can't wait to make a steady paycheck.

What else. How was Valentines? I really could care less about it that day & it didn't cross my mind until I saw all the nurses wearing red...but mine ended up being reallly fuckin ODD. I would have to fill you guys in on that. All bitterness aside (single or taken), I still hate that holiday. Who made it up?!

And soo here I am at the end of the week. Thinking about how crazy it all has been. Thinking about how I never had a chance to just sit down and think. With the insane number of phonecalls I got after that accident, I guess I realized that a lot of people do care (haha). And the fact that I'm still alive, nobody's dead because of me, and I can still be a nurse when I graduate this May......well, geez...I know now more than ever that God is watching us...& I am fortunate & lucky to be sitting here and blogging on pretty Friday afternoon. Whew.

noo fair...

hey, Tess got a new car! I would have to say now, that my car is the ugliest on the lot by far. Doesn't help that Tess' new car is white too...now mine looks yellow :( haha

btw, Fun weekend guys=)

back to Reality. I am soo behind on readings..assignments..lectures...school in general I think mostly because clinicals havent started, soo it was never official to me. Well, got my first one tomorrow in the SICU & wow, I am exciiited but NOT prepared at all. So today, will be devoted to just that--reading everything I possibly can so I don't look like a total idiot tomorrow. &maybe a trip to Walmart & the gym?! hmmmmmm............

if you're still bored right now...go find something to do for Spring break!! Ensenadaa? hahahaa...


this circular motion is all we do.